Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Real Friends

Friends…are they for REAL? Someone asked me, do they still exist in this day and age? Well, I don’t know about you but as far as I’m concerned—I still have a couple of friends worth keeping. I even had friends whom I’ve known way back in grade school. Anyway, here are some tips on how to become a good friend and in that case, you wouldn’t need to look for them because they’ll start hunting you. How’s that? Check this out:

  • Focus on what you can give a friend, not what you can get out of the friendship. If being happy is your only motive for wanting someone to be your friend, then you’re not being a real friend. Don’t get caught up in keeping tabs on who has given most in the friendship. Give to your friends regardless of how much they give to you.

  • Encourage your friend. Real friends inspire and push each other to be the best that they can be, rather than drag each other down. They are happy when other people achieve their goals.

  • Be willing to forgive. Don’t let hurt turn to grudge. This is one sure way to destroy a friendship. Forgive your friend and move on.

  • Tactfully point out their mistakes but be willing to accept yours. This is one way to show concern for others. If you really care, you will tactfully point out a specific example for his own good. But once you’ve brought the problem to your friend’s attention, don’t harp on it all the time. Don’t walk away from friendship when you see some of your friend’s faults. Be patient with a friend as he or she tries to change. Realize that nobody’s perfect.

  • Be reliable. When you say you are going to be there, be there.

  • Don’t try to control your friends. Real friendship does not mean you always have to be together. It may be tempting to have a fun person all to yourself, and fell threatened when your friend spends time with others. When this happens, let her be. Admit it, you guys will also get tired of each other if you’re always together. You need time to spend with others as well. If you’re afraid to let your friends out of your sight, you are probably afraid of losing them. There might be some problem you’ve had to fix in yourself, say you have insecurity issues to work on. Good friendship will endure time spent apart. You and your friends may learn to appreciate each other even more.

  • Be there for both the good and the bad times. It’s so cliché but it’s true. Celebrate with them if your friends are excited about something. But don’t be there just for the good times. When a friend is upset about something, give them your full attention. Most of the time, what friends really need is a sympathetic ear, someone who could listen and understand their feelings.

  • Learn to accept personality differences in your friends. Be careful not to evaluate other people by how you react in a particular situation. Do not automatically take your friend’s behavior personally.

  • Don’t be a blabbermouth. Learn and be willing to keep each other’s secrets.

  • Don’t let arguments destroy your friendship. Don’t keep arguing until you get mad with each other. Just drop it or change the topic. Your desire to win the argument may ruin your friendship.

Follow these steps and for sure, you will have a good relationship with all your friends…

Here’s my message to all my friends: It isn’t everyday that I get a chance to say, thank you for the friendship. I may not offer the greatest kind, but it is certainly my best.

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